Days of our life (24)

short post ma 3leeh ;*
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The next day i woke up really tiered from school .. the only thing i rememberd ehwa ely swena !! w ma gidart ela eni amout '67k !! tithkart youm glt 7ag zyoon bnam bl7mam ! luckly that truley happened . 7set el7mam ygoul r7meeeni plz :p

after school ..

i came back, changed and ate dinner ..

9aba: ashwa ma 3indi homewrok !! :D
Mom: gi3day raj3ay ely a5thteeh elyoum ! 3shan tfhmeena
Me sarcasticly: enshalla enshalla :p

i kisssed her head a flew up to my room !

i decided to just lay on my bed and play some music .. so i put my Headphones on and set my ipod on shuffle ..

w me ben ela8any ..

e'3nyat yzed aljr7 ...

Hal e'3nya tethkrni eb bader He sent it to me last year when we were some kind of close .. not now .. were in two separate worlds w kilwa7d yitna7ash mn elthani ..

we'll apparently ehwa mo ga3d yitna7ash its me who's suffering of getting rid of this love/nightmare  ... and he's having fun ..

you may think that im living the best life with zayed .. its true .. but im suffering .. suffering from a strange love that i want to get out of .. !

the songs lyrics stabed my heart ..

a tear .. then a tear .. then a whole set of tears ..

Ya galbi alzmn hatha j7dni w ent matdre .. Y5ononi t'9eg aldnya b3youni wla tdre !!  Ya galbi shouf hal dnya t3bt w mabga be 7el a3shm 7ali w at9br w agoul bachr Jrou7i tzel .. Yje bacher bla fr7a y3and galbi w jr7aaah ... Draw kel albshr feni ya galbi !! w ent matdre .. k2nk 3ayesh l7alik m3nk 3ayesh eb 9dre W yzed aljr7 kel lailah wla adre lmnhou ashkeeela .. ..

It hurts  :)

When u listen to a song that describes your life .. '3nya tshra7 kil ely ga3da tmreen w t7seen feeh .
.
.

Athkr kna b5eran resort kna nmshi ana wyah w ljoun wya f6om kanw rakben gwari ...

Bader : 9booouy bsr3a choufi eli ymch!!
Me : shfiha !
Bader : 9bouy thb6ely eyaha ana ur cousin shd3wa ;(
i smiled ,, i knew kl8a9da y8harni w bs .. t3awadt .. 
Me : min zeenha ?!

* ooooh laaaa2 al7in 3balah 3shan ana a7ba *

me : bs mdam tbeha wait dgega ..

I went to the girl

Me : ummm slam .,
The girl : w 3laikm alslam ..
Me : hatha ybech w ygol ena mu3jb fech ...
i pointed at bader ..
The girl : kaaaaaaak ent bs shofay wyha =)) eli y2jr gwari a7la !

i faked a smile but felt like punching her in the face ..

but i avoided trouble ..

i went back to bader ..

Bader: ha shgalt !

i lied ..

Me: tgoul ena ehya mu no3ha hal swalf ..
Bader : aha .. ag9 eedi ela entay yahel ma t3arfeen it'6ab6een

ha gave me his back and walked ..

i just stared ... a tear formed in my eye bs lfet wayhi w misa7t'ha eb chmi .. thats all i could do ..

but a little giggle escaped my mouth ..

you know why ?

Because he calls me ugly - fat - w yahel w ma yshouf nafsa .. he calls me that when all the boys want me, im 46 pounds and i know every step he makes w kashfa kil ely ga3da ysweeh w adri ena kl 8a9da ena yjra7ni .. funny ..

blmo5t9ar ytklm 3ani bklaaaam jar7 .. w ma yshouf nafsa ..

.
.

Back to reality !!

i just kept on listinig to songs and thinking ..

Before a couple of months knt libnya ely ta3shigk !! libnya ely matnam ela w ehya mfakra feek !! libnya ely kl ma tnam dam3at 2lam 3la 5adha mn 7ubk!! bs ra'3am kl hatha kanat mos7eel eb 7yat'ha tkrhk .. Ra'3am kil el2lam ely 3ashta bsibitik .. ma krhtk ..

knt elbnt elbree2a ely ma 3ashat 7yat'ha 3adl mthl baji elbnat.. w bsbt shno ma 3isht'ha ..? bsbitk w sibat 7ubk ely 2srha w ma 5lha tshouf '3erk bhal 7yaah aw t7b '3erk !! bs letk t7s :) !!

bs all you did to me was:
-made fun of me
-hurt me
-caused nothing but pain in my life
-talked behind my back .. or sometimes i would hear you but cant do anything except wipe the tears of my face and move on ..
- 6ala3t klam 3ani
- knt t5arb my mood lma knt astanas w tshayish 5wani 3wlay 3shan yhz2ooni jdamk w t'67ak (shftaw el78ara :)?)
- you played with my feelings
- you pretended to love me for some times and make me feel that I'm all yours but then just say that it was you goofing around .. kan ygouli " la 9booy m9adga eni byoum ba7bich ? lool keep dreaming " and i just laughed w a5th elmaw'6oo3 jdama 3la '3shmara .. bs bda5li galbi yin3i9r ..

if ga3adt aktb elashya2 ely kan ysweeha .. mara7 a5al9 believe me ..

bs now everything changed .. i decided to forget you .. i decided to mark you as a PAST in my life .. i didnt yet .. but enshalla i will .. la2ni wagaft kl7yati 3shank w ni6art 7ubk 7 sneen

a5rt'ha tmadet ..

w hathi ely 9j bee9eer ..ra7 ansak bader .. bs ms2alat wakt ..

** Alzain's point of view **

i was in the car heading back home from school .. ashwa fai9al ma dara 3an shay !! jad lazm agoul 7ag 9booy tashker zayed

B.M.X:
PING!!!
PING!!!
PING!!!
PING!!!

Me: just what i needed :) lesh ana dayman mgroda b7yati ;'( ?
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o know mlee8 elpost :p bs bl8a9b gidarna naktiba ;*